I’m struggling to write this. I sat here for longer than I’d like to admit thinking about the last time I did a Five Minute Friday post and wondering why I haven’t done it. Then decided that I might as well at least start typing something…anything…and see where it leads.
My heart wants to tell you to do the same thing. I don’t know if it’s about writing for you – maybe it’s something more. Maybe it’s feeling like you’re stuck wanting community and friends and sisters and not being able to remember the last time you laughed with your girls until your sides ached and tears streamed down your face. Be brave, friend. Make plans to go do something instead of waiting to be invited.
Or you could be like me – too many words, not enough coffee, a fear that what is written here could be a bitter failure, lost in the depths of hundreds of brilliantly written linked up posts. This writing thing isn’t for the weak of heart. It’s for the ones who are willing to pursue passionately what God has put on their hearts, even to the point of allowing themselves to be last. Last in line for a book deal, last to link up, last to leave a comment, last to be invited. Be brave, writer. Put words to paper anyway.
And then, of course, there is motherhood. Putting yourself last for a lifetime to provide and care for and love on and dream with and….while sacrificing time, patience, cute shoes, and shirts without shoulder stains. God moves when we put our pride aside. When we stop trying to be Him. There has been no more humbling way to learn to put myself, my needs, my wishlists last than having a child.
I choose to be last today. I want my daughter to see that the beauty of community is not about a bunch of people who decide that they all need to be first. That the best leaders, writers, mothers, and friends put others first and raise them up while kneeling humbly down low before God. Be brave, sister. Put yourself last today so that God can shine in all you do.
Dana Butler says
Welllllll, I just might. 🙂
What we should do is set the linky to put the most recent post first on the list instead of showing the first submitted 😉 that would throw people for a loop! the last really would be first!
Hey neighbor 🙂 Praying for your father-in-law, so sorry to hear you’re going through a hard time.
Feel free to stop by and ramble any time!
this made me smile so much 🙂
So happy for you to have them 🙂
Jen Underwood says
SHAZAAM! I am marking this for my girls. Because they fight to be first. All. The. Time. And I struggle with showing them the glory in being last. In leading from behind. And THESE WORDS are what I need. Thank you, friend!!! I am copying. Pasting. Hanging in my house. Thank you Lord for giving these words to Crystal so that I could have them!!
Laura Robb says
Beautiful post! Thank you for sharing these words, Crystal. Reading this encourages my heart. I love when you remind us to “Be brave.” That is exactly what we need to keep writing.
Janel A says
First of all, I'[m glad to see you again at FMF…I’ve missed you (or perhaps you were there, i just missed you, I know you’ve got alot of your plate) I totally just wrote this before I read your entry…
So much goodness in this friend. So much. One of the several points that resonated was this line “God moves when we put our pride aside. When we stop trying to be Him.” Oh yes…
and thank you for sharing from the depth of your heart dear one…
I have so missed you at #FMFParty AND I am so glad that you have taken from Him what you’ve needed during that time. You bless in so many ways friend and your words today – they could be the words that my heart writes because they echo a lot of what’s in there. Thank you for the reminder Cyrstal that last is not last in this Kingdom Work that we do… love you sister.
Deb Anderson Weaver says
This is beautiful. Thank you for encouraging us–I haven’t tried Five Minute Friday yet because of fear, of knowing how long it takes me to process and then write, of not yet truly believing my voice matters, of busyness… I want to try, and I appreciate your honest encouragement alongside me!
Perhaps we’ll meet at Allume!
Lindsey Brackett says
This is the new quote about writing: This writing thing isn’t for the weak of heart. It’s for the ones who are willing to pursue passionately what God has put on their hearts, even to the point of allowing themselves to be last.
Holly Solomon Barrett says
Be brave. So true that writing requires much bravery. Thanks for being brave with us, Crystal!
This Life I Live says
Amen! Looks like something great came together! Glad you sat down and started writing!
Meredith Sings says
oh my graciousness. this is just — pure awesomeness. Reality, and truth, and vulnerability and exactly what it is all about. You are amazing.
Kim Hyland says
Bullseye! This resounds with emotions I’ve felt today as a friend, writer and mom. There’s a lot of comfort in that. Thank you for sharing vulnerably and encouraging me as well.
We do not moan about all yours stacks. And stacks of words filled neatly in the cabinet of your mind for we wait to hear and read them all.
Karrilee Aggett says
LOVE this – and I am so glad you typed it out and let it flow! You’ve been missed, oh mighty ninja!
Thank you for posting this! Your words are marinating in my heart…
“This writing thing isn’t for the weak of heart. It’s for the ones who are willing to pursue passionately what God has put on their hearts, even to the point of allowing themselves to be last. Last in line for a book deal, last to link up, last to leave a comment, last to be invited. Be brave, writer. Put words to paper anyway.”
Dana Butler says
Uuugh! Feel ya on this one, my friend! Ditto on all of it. Every bit.
Thanks for putting words to this.
Dana Butler says
YES. And gotta echo Christie – BOOM. BAM. SO. GOOD.
Thank you for writing this.
Putting others first while kneeling humbly down low before God. Motherhood’s all about that, eh? Others’ needs. Others’ desires. Others’ pursuits.
And in the quiet of our own hearts before the Lord – hearing His “well done.” His whisper is what takes us from being defined as “always last” to “always HIS.”
Which is what matters, and why we end up first in the Kingdom.
Thanks for making me think and letting me take up your comment space with my ramble. 🙂
Hmmm, I could not figure out how to log in either … .http://keeponpath.wordpress.com/
Great – enjoyed!
Dawn Sullivan says
It’s me. There was a problem and I couldn’t log in with Discus! LOL
christie elkins. says
BOOM. for the win. Stine is BRINGING it. Okay, I am done yelling now 😉 I am most always last to link up, last in a long line at the grocery store. That’s ok, though. Those waiting the longest have the most time to show love 🙂
Dawn Sullivan says
Saw your face on the site and had to read your words today. I have been pretty disconnected from blog land lately… for many reasons. And I have thought about you. Missed you. Your sweet smile and your words that reflect such a sweet heart. Even though you cheated (pondered your thoughts! LOL) I am soooo glad you did and just wanted to give you a blog hug. You are beautiful. Inside and out.
Cindy Winter-Hartley says
You sound like an awesome woman! I’m your “next door FMF neighbor” today
and I really appreciated your words. I’m trying to be brave, to
remember to be last, to put a very needing person first and to rely on
Jesus through this season of life. My father-in-law has a brain disease
and it’s been very hard. I haven’t written on my blog in weeks so today
was a cathartic exercise. Thank you for sharing and encouraging!
Becky Daye says
“God moves when we put our pride aside”. Love that, Crystal! Praying for you today. Please keep sharing and writing. I don’t think you realize how much your words bless the community who loves you!!!
Thank you Cyrstal. I often feel like I’ve walked into a crowded room, unnoticed, amongst so many beautiful and talented writers. But I am learning it’s okay to be last, as long as I am doing what God has called and gifted me to do! Blessings!
Lori Harris says
Oh, I love this post! I find myself not wanting to join the party because sometimes it feels more like clamoring to be first and less like a safe place. I thought I was the only on intimidated by the frenzy and better writers. Love that you chose to be last.
Amy Tilson says
I’ve missed your Fridays, too. Lots of hugs for you in this totally crazy season of life. Let go of the expectations and just do your thing, because you do it marvelously.
Oh Crystal, you said exactly what my heart has been struggling with lately. Our posts this week for FMF are similar in our plight to do what GOd has called us to do. Thank you for reminding me us to be brave. So bald I am not the only one that feels this way. Looking forward to looking around your blog a bit more!
Hannah Boning says
Such a needed reminder. It’s so hard to put myself last. Welcome back to FMF 🙂
Every time I stop by your space, Crystal, I leave feeling encouraged. Thank you for this…you are a blessing to this community and to me! Have a beautiful weekend, friend. 🙂
So glad I delayed my shower and breakfast to read this, Crystal. So glad that you didn’t sit there any longer and just started typing. Can’t wait to meet you in person and give you a huge hug. Love this and love you dear friend!