I’ve had a thought bouncing around in my head for awhile. It started after reading Ann Voskamp’s beautiful book, 1000 Gifts and has God just won’t let me forget about it. Which means I’m feeling a little convicted. And that’s not something I like, but something I know I need occasionally. Not too often though, thanks so much. {wink}
So here it is. Expectations are dangerous. When I have an expectation of someone or some situation, I begin to feel entitled to have that exact thing happen. And when it doesn’t? Disappointment. Expectations lead to entitlement, and entitlement leads to disappointment. In my own personal experience, nothing good comes from that combination. I speak from my heart when I say that – God has revealed to me recently that I have allowed this trifecta to flat out ruin situations and relationships.
When I go into a date night with my husband with an expectation that it will be magical and wonderful and it doesn’t happen like a movie date? Hello, grumpy pants.
When I go into work with an expectation that my day will go a certain way, and so-and-so will treat me a certain way, and I will be showered with praise and promotions, and it doesn’t happen? Hello, frustration.
When I share my heart with a friend, and she doesn’t react the way I think I need her to? Goodbye, friend.
When I go to God with a prayer request, a deep desire for a specific outcome for a situation, and it doesn’t happen the way that I think it should? Even then, disappointment.
God does not call us to go into relationships with one another to control what the relationship will look like, or what the other person will say or do. He also does not call us to have that kind of relationship with Him. I can’t imagine how much better my life would be without expectations. No entitlement. No more disappointment when things don’t go the way I think they should – when no one else even knows what I’m secretly expecting of them. How much richer my life would be, if I would simply let it go.
Lord, help me see past my selfish needs and focus on the relationships, and trust You to fulfill the needs of my heart, in the way only you can.
Great post. Expecting the best can’t be a bad thing, but setting up a false scenario in order to find happiness can definitely mess up a good day! You expressed this wonderfully.