Last night was our final “Psalms of Ascent” study, and I am so bummed! God has done more work in my heart during this short 6 week study than in any other study I’ve done in a long time. Each session was amazing, but last night was something more.
I laughed. I nearly cried. I heard a fresh Word from the Lord and had goosebumps every time Beth Moore read scripture. My soul is shaken and I don’t know where to go from here, other than continuing to go flat on my face before the Lord.
Confession time: I like being in control. I like feeling important and saying “yes” to all kinds of opportunities that are presented to me, especially ones that might help my career or boost my importance-level.
Realization: I can’t do that. My focus is in all the wrong places, and there are some things that God might just be calling me to give up. He wants me to go to Him first, before saying “yes” – to wait for His guidance and anointing over the opportunity. Beth Moore pointed out that God did not give us these heavy loads to bear – all the stress and anxiety and insecurity – we did that. I did that. And by adding on more than what God has called for my life, I am making the load I bear so heavy that I can’t take the next step He calls me to on my pilgrimage. Oh here come the tears again.
May the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen. Hebrews 13:20-21