I haven’t commented on every post, but I’ve read them all. I’ve read your journey. And I want tell you that you are speaking life & freedom into parts of my heart that haven’t been changed by surgery, but have been inflated by impossible to reach standards.Parts of me that I have used my own hands to craft & form, things I’ve done to make myself look impressive from the outside, holding on to a pride that wouldn’t let me say a true “yes” to God the way I wanted to. The reconstruction has been painful, but God is determined to get me back down to the basics – just who He wants me to be.No fluff. No pride. No recognition. Just His daughter. It brings me a great deal of joy (maybe that rebel kind?).
Over the last few months God has been hard at work on that reconstruction, and it’s been ugly at times. I haven’t had words to put to what I’ve felt like I’ve been going through until I read Alisa’s story. I’ve had to make hard decisions that put God higher than my pride. I’ve pushed myself to do things I never thought I could do before, not by my strength, but because I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
On my own? I’m proud. I quit. I’m selfish. I take the easy way out and easily fulfill commitments to others while putting myself last. But that’s not who God is asking me to be in this season. He’s taking a scalpel to the areas of my life that I’ve built up for my own glory, and He’s knocking them down a few notches. He’s reminding me that He gave me this body, and it’s a gift to take care of, not to ignore. And He’s not so gently showing me the negative ways I’ve spoken to myself, the lies I’ve believed, and pushing me to love myself for who He made me to be.
You see, my story? It doesn’t have to match Alisa’s, or yours, or hers perfectly to feel that heart connection. But God can’t use your story to change my heart, to comfort, encourage, inspire, or motivate if you never share it. It’s why I love writing and speaking, and why I have a huge place in my heart for the internet. Whether you tell your story on a stage or in 140 characters, someone needs to hear it. Don’t judge the worth of your story by the number of comments or shares you receive – if I hadn’t taken the time to reach out, Alisa would never have known I was reading.
Share your story. Bring some rebel joy and freedom into someone’s life today.
Thank you for sharing your story and the growth God is doing in you.
Crystal,
I love the road your blog is taking. It has helped me to get reconnected in just the slightest way with my faith and being faithful. I love having your little messages in my inbox that remind me I am on a journey, to go and pray and most of all to be thankful when I am feeling ungrateful. Thanks for putting it out there for me and others like me.
Leah, I wish I could hug you. Thank you seems so small when I feel so overwhelmingly grateful for your words. They might be the kindest anyone has said to me. xoxo